EMDR - How and Why I Use it In My Practice
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Getting Unstuck
EMDR is a powerful tool for helping clients make positive changes in their lives. I use EMDR with clients in several different ways. Most often, I get to know a client pretty well and help them scope out the areas they most need to work on before we dive into EMDR. Other times, clients are eager to start or have a specific thing they want to work on and we dive right into it. Whatever the route to EMDR, clients report feeling freed from their old stories, finding that old triggers no longer have the same effect and that they feel much more grounded in previously upsetting situations. Here are some things clients have reported finding easier to handle after EMDR:
EMDR is not a magic bullet that instantly changes old patterns into new ones, but it can help you redefine your story and put emotional challenges into a healthier context. It's useful when you have a situation in your life you've been trying to change but can't seem to no matter how much you're aware of it and understand it. That's what happened for me and it's why I decided to get trained in EMDR. |
How EMDR Helped Me
I first encountered EMDR about fifteen years ago when I was dealing with a lot of anxiety around work. Anxiety has complex roots and I won't go into all of mine, but it was clear to me at that time that part of it was a classic fear of failure and, as Carol Dweck would say, a fixed mindset, both of which were showing up in force at work. My therapist was amazing and we talked through all of this many times and it made total sense to me. But I couldn't shake it. My boss then had a critical management style which was front and center in our fairly open environment and every time he approached my desk I experienced a sort of internal collapse. I just froze and waited for the "attack". Even though I knew better! No matter how mindful I was, or what I said to myself, I couldn't shake that gut reaction to what was actually just normal work interaction between boss and employee.
Finally, my therapist said we should try EMDR. I remember very little about the actual EMDR session except that it felt kind of intense and at the same time I wasn't sure anything had happened. But the next day, sitting at my desk, something odd happened. I heard my boss approaching my desk and instead of the internal collapse I always experienced, I said a loud, rather calm "F--- YOU" in my mind. Fortunately that all stayed in my mind because my boss was (and is) actually a great guy who was by no means intentionally torturing me. I was torturing me. Or, more accurately, my brain had been wired to torture me. After that I could look at him and just see a person with a ton of experience and information about all the things that could go wrong on a project and a critical management style that was more about him than me. Things at work got a much easier for me emotionally after that.
My first EMDR session is an example of a simple case in which one session helped significantly, and this is true for many people. I went on to have EMDR in other areas with my therapist and during my trainings and all of those sessions have been helpful. For more complex trauma that is rooted in childhood, EMDR is most effective over many sessions that break it down into smaller pieces. Adult onset trauma may also require many sessions depending on what the trauma is.
EMDR is not a magic bullet but, as my therapist told me, EMDR is like an antibiotic - it helps you heal more quickly and tackle things that your own emotional immune system might not be able to tackle on its own. I hope this gives you a sense of how EMDR can be helpful. For more information about how it actually works, you can read my blog article. if you have any questions, please feel free to contact me. I'd love to talk to you about it!
Finally, my therapist said we should try EMDR. I remember very little about the actual EMDR session except that it felt kind of intense and at the same time I wasn't sure anything had happened. But the next day, sitting at my desk, something odd happened. I heard my boss approaching my desk and instead of the internal collapse I always experienced, I said a loud, rather calm "F--- YOU" in my mind. Fortunately that all stayed in my mind because my boss was (and is) actually a great guy who was by no means intentionally torturing me. I was torturing me. Or, more accurately, my brain had been wired to torture me. After that I could look at him and just see a person with a ton of experience and information about all the things that could go wrong on a project and a critical management style that was more about him than me. Things at work got a much easier for me emotionally after that.
My first EMDR session is an example of a simple case in which one session helped significantly, and this is true for many people. I went on to have EMDR in other areas with my therapist and during my trainings and all of those sessions have been helpful. For more complex trauma that is rooted in childhood, EMDR is most effective over many sessions that break it down into smaller pieces. Adult onset trauma may also require many sessions depending on what the trauma is.
EMDR is not a magic bullet but, as my therapist told me, EMDR is like an antibiotic - it helps you heal more quickly and tackle things that your own emotional immune system might not be able to tackle on its own. I hope this gives you a sense of how EMDR can be helpful. For more information about how it actually works, you can read my blog article. if you have any questions, please feel free to contact me. I'd love to talk to you about it!